Tired

So my son is possessed by the devil. Anywhere near his bedtime he turns from that sweet little boy to a demon lol. We have been having issues with sleep. One nap is not enough but 2 is too many. I am not sure how to handle it because this means hes fights his nap and wakes up 1-3 times a night... awesome. (sarcasm)

So i am sleep deprived.. its not as bad as a newborn i will admit... but the lack of sleeping 8 hours straight EVER sucks... and he starts getting cranky/tired around 4... for the next around 2 1/2 hours he is possessed. I swear if it was humanly possible for his head to spin around and him spit green vomit he would.

On another note we had his 2nd time of going to music class that his grandma paid for us to go to. He did a little better this time and ran around crazy like... not as shy... haha.. yeah shy.

So we just got home and I think i am going to nap too... yeah an adult napping.. i need to clean the house and all that but i am worn out dude!

Just another day... erm.. morning?

Ever have that time where you just can't sleep, no matter how hard you try you just lay there. You cant shut off your mind. I am there and have been since... well... i was in high school. Some times are better than others and this is a horrid time. Sooo that is why I come here tonight/this morning...

It is 3:30am and I am just not sleepy so i sit here playing world of warcraft and surfing the net. Interesting fact, you know all the old childrens nursery rhymes we heard as kids? they are all demented!

ring around the rosy (rosy patches from the plague)
pockets full of poesy's (flowers put in the deads pockets to keep them from stinking)
ashes ashes (dead's ashes)
we all fall down (die)

think about them... old mother hubbard, jack sprat... crazy huh?

RIP Layla Grace

I wanted to tell you all of an issue that plagues the world, that no one knows HOW real it is until they experience it or know someone who does. It is known as cancer. I can strike anyone but I am talking childhood cancer. Everyone knows it exists but most tend to put it out of their minds, either to makes themselves feel better or they just plainly dont give a shit. When i say "dont give a shit" this is more or less directed at celebrities who say, buy their daughter suri cruise a 100k paci with diamonds.

Meanwhile our babies are dying everyday. One specifically that recently caught mine and many around the worlds attention is little Layla Grace. She was 2. I say was because she is no longer with us. She passed away 3-9-10. Of neroblastoma, its a form of cancer... one of the many that is killing our kids. NO CHILD should have to suffer like this... ever. No one should (well maybe rapists and such...).

That last thing i said starts me on something else i will touch on real fast. I am an athiest and here is why. Little beautiful girls like Layla suffer their few short years on earth and the child molestors and murderers live long healthy lives. How is that in any way shape or form fair? It makes me sick.

So here is what i am asking. If you are out or get anything in the mail... anything to do with childhood cancer or cancer in general. Please donate. Anything counts. Send $20 to St.Jude. Participate if your town has a cancer walk. Do this for all the babies fighting for their lives. Do this for all the babies who have given up their lives on a daily basis. Do this for the ones to get diagnosed today, next week, next year. UNTIL WE FIND A CURE.

Do it for Layla Grace

and Brooke, and Curtis, and Jessica, and Sammie, and Adrianna, and Bennie... and all the others I have followed on caringbridge that have lost their battle with cancer or other childhood diseases.

and dont tell me you dont have time/money... because there is ALWAYS a way to help.
INCLUDING signing up here to be a bone marrow donor. Its simple. They send you cotton swabs in the mail to swab your mouth and oyu mail it back in. If by chance you ever end up being a match (i know people who have been on the registry for 20 years and never gotten a call) then you can save a life. SAVE A LITTLE BOY OR GIRL... give them a chance at living as you have done. You can then say your life had meaning and REALLY matters. DO IT!

Does the whining ever stop?

Erik is in the kitchen, and i, in the room next to it. He is fussing over nothing. He still has 2 hours till bed. I think i know now why animals eat their young lol.

He has been diagnosed with some sort of issue. No specifics either, maybe they just want my money. Its not like that would be anything new for the whole doctor field. He is 15 months and he doesn't talk. Now when i say this to people they say "ooo i have a 2 year old that doesn't talk" but when i inform them that he doesn't even say mama or dada they say "well they do say that.. and dog, kitty and hypothesis". (starting to sense some sarcasm in the post).

He is supposed to be getting help with early intervention. Until then i get the joy of having the child who fully walked at 10 months and is running now... but can only scream... and point. but it is a game of what he is pointing at. He will point at the cabinets and scream. Keep in mind there are like 30 things in there... and i am supposed to figure out WHAT he is pointing at. And god forbid i get it wrong... then you feel the wrath of the toddler. I am sure those of you more experienced with this sort of thing understand. or hell, those of you who have been to a store where a toddler has been.

To make things clear i love my son, he drives me crazy to the point i fear i will never come back and may end up in the place with padded walls but i would die without him. He is my life, my joy.

Confessions of a stay at home mother

What is it to be a mother? is it spit up stains on your clothes? the fact that getting poop on your hand doesn't phase you? what about your tolerance... i know mine went way way way up, especially once my son hit 1 year of age.

My name is Kelly and i am 24 almost 25. I have a 15 month old son named Erik Draven (yes after the movie "the crow". We live in Virginia (yes make all the jokes you want, I will join you).

I am the not so normal person. I want to seem normal to Erik but i doubt that is going to happen. I am not so great socially, saying what is on my mind/the truth when it is not called for. I suck at making friends and getting my points across. I also suck at capitalizing at the beginning of sentences.

I started this blog out of boredom. I always make fun of those with blogs and still do and still will. (I am allowed to make fun of myself). If you actually choose to continue reading this, you will hear language not suitable for little eyes, my point of views (that may differ from yours). You may be offended, you may wonder how someone so cold could exist but I assure you I am just honest and if you look deep down inside yourself you MAY realize you too share these feelings (maybe not but who cares) but most of you will. I have been told i say out loud what many are thinking and if not... well this is me. Like it or not.